Author's webpage: http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Parthenon/9335/fiction.htm

It was ship's morning on the lost starship Voyager, and her captain was dealing with yet another in a series of crisis that had plagued her crew since the beginning of their ill-fated journey. But this situation was a little bit different from the others, as it concerned a crewmember who could define the word different.

"Mr.Ellison." the Vulcan's voice was just as flat and emotionless as it was supposed to be. "Please explain your tardiness this morning."

To be called into the captain's office by his superior officer and dressed down was only the icing on a very bad cake.

Staring straight ahead, not meeting the eyes of anyone else in the room, lt. James Ellison spoke flatly.

"I overfocused on something this morning and remained in a zone until Lt.Tuvok found me some time later."

"I thought we had fixed this." Janeway glanced at the Lt. "Didn't we program the computer in his quarters to alert the doctor if this happened?"

"Apparently we did not cover every contingency."

"What did you zone on this time, Jim?" sounding more friendly, Chakotay spoke up.

"The sound of the water in the shower, sir. The computer had no way to register that I was having trouble."

"And when Tuvok found you, you were unconscious and close to death." Janeway said slowly.

"So I'm told, captain." without changing expression the lt made it clear that he didn't think that was such a bad thing.

"We're going to have to do something here, Ellison." she said slowly. "Return to sick bay for the rest of the day, I'd like the doctor to monitor you."

"Yes, sir." knowing he was dismissed, Ellison left quickly. Behind him the captain sighed deeply and leaned back in her chair, eyeing her chief of security.

"This is becoming a problem, Tuvok."

"I don't know what to tell you, captain. Mr.Ellison is an excellent officer. It is unfortunate that he has not found a Guide to bond with. A Sentinel pair can be very useful."

"Isn't there an age limit on that? I mean, from what I've read, if he doesn't bond soon his zones are going to become more and more frequent and eventually he'll die in one."

"Yes, captain. That is why he is here in the first place. Most of his kind find Guides on their homeworld, Cascadia. Those that don't go to earth and other human planets and search. There are even several Human/Vulcan Sentinel/Guide pairs."

"But he hasn't found one." Chakotay sat back. "And, if our most recent counseling session is any indication, he doesn't think he will."

"Should I relieve him of duty?"

"His self-image is fragile at best, Captain." Chak spoke slowly. "His position on the bridge is the only thing holding him together right now."

"Well, he can't have a single room anymore. We need to find someone who doesn't have too much to do right now and assign them to watch over lt Ellison."

"He won't like that, Kathryn."

"I'll not have him dying." she snapped. "Especially over his pride. There has to be someone on this ship that man can tolerate, if not actually bond with."

"And how long do you plan to continue this, captain?" Tuvok's voice was deferential.

"As long as it takes. Until we get home, if necessary."

"I'll start looking for a roommate." Chakotay stood. "Tuvok, send Ellison to my quarters after dinner tonight. I should have someone by then." he glanced at Kathryn. "Did you have anyone in mind?"

"No. Look among the science crew, the ones who haven't had much to do lately. The cheerful, friendly, tolerant ones. Bring the suggestions to me and we'll go over them together."

Chak nodded and left. Janeway studied Tuvok carefully.

"You think I made a mistake, accepting Ellison as crew."

"I think you were trying to do a favor for a friend."

"Admiral Banks has known Ellison's family for many years. When he asked if Jim could join the crew, I admit that I hesitated. A Sentinel can be very valuable on a starship, but unbonded? Then Banks said that a fleet ship was the man's best chance at finding a Guide."

"Normally it would have been." the Vulcan agreed. "If we were still in the Alpha Quadrant and making frequent stops at starbases, planets and colonies, he would have had the opportunity to meet people. Universities and schools often keep lists of potential Guides and other interested persons."

"But now..." sighing, she swiveled her chair to look out the porthole, where the glowing streaks of warpspeed could be faintly seen.

"You could not have predicted this, Kathryn." her old friend offered comfort.

"If he doesn't bond, he dies. It's almost a Vulcan thing, Tuvok."

The Vulcan remained silent, not commenting on that.

"I have twelve possibilities." Chak said, handing her a datapadd. "I thought that you were hoping that one of them may actually take the Guide role, so eleven of them are women."

"That's a little bigoted of you, Chakotay." accepting the pad, she began scanning the first file.

"Apparently it's a Sentinel thing. All of their pairings are male/female. Same-sex relationships are not allowed."

"Then it's a good thing our Tom and Harry aren't Sentinel and Guide, isn't it." she smiled at him. The relationship between their Ops officer and the pilot often made her smile.

Of the twelve people Chakotay suggested, she only had objections to one, an astrophysicist.

"She may end up working too many hours to watch over him properly."

"Agreed. So, do I speak to Ellison now? Do you want to join me?"

"Let's go over the idea with them first." she said. "See how many are really willing to take on this new assignment. It will be basically babysitting, with few breaks, and although they won't need to join him on the bridge, I think they should know what to expect and be willing before we assign them."

"Ellison is known to have a temper." the first officer agreed.

"But his abilities make him worth the effort."

"Okay, that's all but the last one. I'm leaning toward Ensign Carafe and lt. Fox at this point. They both seemed willing and able to take on this assignment."

"I have to agree. Perhaps Ensign Bi as well. Who is that last one on the list?"

"That will be Ensign Sandburg. I only included him as a last resort. He has a very high empathy rating for a human, but he's also rather boisterous and far too smart for his own good. Started at the Vulcan Science Academy at 14, learning to control his empathy and studying xenothropology, then went on to Fleet Academy, where he finished a year early. This is his first deep-space mission, he's only had scientific postings before.

Kathryn looked worried. "I've let so many things slide, Chakotay. I really should know this young man better. He's supposed to be tops in his field, and here is he assigned to my ship and I've never even met him."

"There's no reason for you to have met him captain. From everything I've heard he's friendly, energetic, and keeps strange hours. Exactly what we'd expect from an eccentric scientist. But his field is the tribal guardian myth." Chak smiled. "He hasn't found a lot of evidence for it lately. "

"Not out here, I can imagine." she chuckled ruefully, "What is he doing with his time?"

"Apparently he keeps busy. His duty officer says she lets him arrange his own schedule, he helps out wherever he's needed. A bit of a jack-of-all-trades, he's worked in astrophysics, biology, engineering, and he even helps Neelix in the kitchen."

The door chimed.

"And he's known for being tardy." Chak said, with a quickly-smothered grin.

The captain called out and the door opened, allowing a small, energetic man in his mid-to-late twenties to basically bounce into the room. He came to a stop in front of the captain and saluted quickly.

"Ensign Blair Sandburg, reporting as ordered, sir."

"At ease, Ensign." Kathryn was aware that she was staring. Beside her Chakotay smothered another grin.

Sandburg was very pretty, in a masculine way, and tremendously attractive in a way that transcended gender... but what caught the captain's attention was the long, heavy, dark brown braid that ran the length of his back, the end hanging between his legs, just above his knees.

"Ensign?" she arched an eyebrow, questioning.

"Claimed under religious freedoms, regulation 211, amendment 17c." he said cheerfully.

"You've claimed your hair under religious freedoms?" a raised eyebrow greeted that statement.

"Yes, sir." a nod punctuated by a bounce.

"And what religion would that be?"

"Leerist, sir."

"Leerism?" giving Chak a hard stare when he smothered another grin, she fixed her eyes back on the young man. "There haven't been any practitioners of Leerism in...two hundred years or more!"

"Actually, sir, my mother runs the last enclave on Earth. In Big Sur, California."

"It's true, captain." Chak said, his voice reflecting his amusement. "And since he isn't in a combat position..."

"Learn something new every day." she sighed. "Have a seat, Ensign Sandburg. We have a proposition for you."

The young ensign proved to be every bit as intelligent as his file said he was and made it clear that he was willing to help in whatever way he could. By the time he was dismissed Kathryn was smiling and Chak had actually laughed several times as Sandburg became more enthusiastic, his hands flying demonstratively as he segued from his empathy rating to Star Fleet politics to his own opinions about Sentinels, which he actually knew quite a bit about already.

"You're going to be our last resort." the captain told him. "But be ready."

"I'll study up on it." he'd bounded out of the room.

"I get tired just watching him."

"It's that positive outlook thing." Chak chuckled. "If they could bottle it..."

"Enter." sitting on her sofa trying to enjoy a cup of Neelix's pseudo-coffee, Janeway was surprised when Chakotay stepped in, looking more than a little grim. "What is it?" she ran over the possibilities in her mind....there were at least a dozen ongoing 'situations' they were keeping an eye on now.

"Lt.Larson just came to see me. She's asking to be reassigned."

"What is it this time?" with a heavy sigh the captain set down her cup.

"It's not Ellison's fault." the first officer said. "He zoned and she couldn't bring him out of it. The doctor revived him, but the incident frightened her. She says that she doesn't want to be so directly responsible for someone's life."

Running a hand over her face, Janeway sighed again.

"So, how many does that make?" she asked, although she knew all too well.

"Seven. And two of the others on the list have asked to be removed from consideration."

"Tell me again what the problems have been."

Finally sitting, Chakotay stretched his long legs out and ticked the list off on his fingers.

"Ensign Carafe smelled bad, as did Lt. Tundol. Ensign Bi's double heartbeat was distracting. Two others left when Ellison lost his temper. Lt.Fox just didn't like him, a cultural conflict. Ensign Milne simply got sick and had to be replaced."

"And now Larson doesn't want the responsibility."

This time they sighed together.

"I had hoped Tundol would work out, as there have been Vulcan-Sentinel pairs before." the captain spoke at length. "I would ask Tuvok, but he has too many other commitments."

"And the other Vulcans on board are already bonded." Chak agreed. "We're running out of options, captain. Perhaps the neural monitor the doctor suggested?"

"That would still only be a stopgap measure. Eventually he would go too deep to revive him. And being pulled back time and again would cause brain damage."

"I know."

Letting the room fall silent, Janeway picked up the cup and sipped.

Angry and unwilling, Ellison had followed orders. Moving to new quarters, he had accepted each attempted roommate-slash- keeper with ill grace, first one and then another and another. At first he had even seemed tentatively hopeful; but now, after more than four months, he was surly and withdrawn, refusing counseling sessions with Chakotay, doing little more than working his shift and keeping up with his physical exercises, spending all other time alone in his quarters, barely sleeping, seldom eating. Concerned over him, Neelix now took meals to the Sentinel personally, cooking especially bland dishes for his too-sensitive palate, encouraging him to eat.

"Let's try Sandburg." she spoke at last. "Maybe his enthusiasm will rub off."

"Or get him killed." Chak shook his head. "Captain. Ellison was a good man and had great potential. But I don't think he even wants to try anymore."

"So we just let him curl up and die? No. That is unacceptable. I owe Simon Banks my life and he considers this man the closest thing he has to a brother. I will do everything I possibly can, and then I will find something else to try."

"I'll make the arrangements." Standing, Chakotay looked down at her. "But we need to start developing contingency plans."

"We can't put him into stasis for the next 60 years, Chakotay."

"We may have to. To save his life."

No one knew how a Sentinel would respond to long-term stasis. But no one thought it was a good idea to find out, either.

"A man? A male? No!" although he shouted, Ellison did not move, but his eyes flashed angrily. "Commander, I have gone along with this and put up with this long enough. I think it's time we all accepted the truth here." his voice would have done a Vulcan proud. "I am a Sentinel without a Guide. I'm almost forty years old. I'm going to die."

"I can't accept that!" on his feet now, in the man's face, the first officer shouted. "I won't. Try to look beyond your social upbringing. Give this man a chance. We don't expect you to bond with him. Just let him keep an eye on you like the others."

"I've heard about Sandburg. He's a Leerist, sir. They don't have any rules about anything, they preach a level of freedom that can only be described as anarchy!"

"But he's also a Star Fleet officer. He's taken the vows that requires and been an honor to his uniform." Chak countered.

"Free sex, drug use, intellectual freedom....I cannot tolerate the man."

"He won't be trying to convert you, Ellison. From everything I've read, that's not the way they work. You will be sharing quarters with Ensign Sandburg and you will try to get along with him. That's an order, mister."

"Yes, sir." the words gritted out between clenched teeth, Ellison was practically snarling.

"Expect him tonight at 1800." Chak snapped, turning away. "Dismissed."

Holding a small container in his hands, Ensign Sandburg paused in the corridor and took several deep cleansing breaths.

"I can do this. I can do this." he told himself quietly. "I can. I can."

Despite his knowledge of what to expect, he was still startled when the door hissed open and the man he was coming to look after glared at him.

"Don't stand there talking to yourself like a ninny." Ellison barked. "Get in here."

Blinking at the hostility in Ellison's voice and body language, the younger man stepped hastily inside.

"Is that all you have?" stepping back as the door closed, the bigger man looked him up and down scornfully.

"Some friends are going to help me move everything else in tomorrow morning." as if he was suddenly released from restraints, Sandburg began pacing the main room of the quarters. His hands moved as he spoke quickly. "So, well, hey, you know who I am and I know who you are. I've done a lot of research on Sentinels and I think I can help you. At least, I think I can recognize a zone before it gets too deep and I've thought of a couple of ways that might bring you out of one, so which is my room and what time do you normally sleep?"

"Damn, kid, breathe." Ellison still stood by the door, arms crossed over his chest. "Look, I don't have anything against you personally, but I'm only doing this because Commander Chakotay ordered me too. Your room is the left one, I go to bed early, don't keep me awake, stay out of my way, and we'll get along fine." the sarcasm was all too clear in that statement.

"Stay out of your way?" disappointment filled sparkling blue eyes. "I was hoping we could spend some time together, maybe run a few tests. You're just about the oldest unbonded Sentinel ever, you know that, right? If we could figure out why you haven't been able to find a mate..."

His words trailed off as Ellison made an angry sound and turned on his heel, leaving Sandburg's voice echoing in the room as the door closed behind him.

"Okay, so maybe that's not such a good idea." shoulders slumped, the young scientist went to check out his room.

"Ensign Sandburg, report to the mess hall. Ensign Sandburg, the mess hall."

Chakotay's voice was harsh and angry. Fumbling with the bedclothes, Blair sat up and blinked at the chronometer.

It blinked serenely back at him...0736.

"Oh, man." with a sound suspiciously like a whine he bounced from the bed, reaching for a clean uniform.

Mumbling to himself, he dressed rapidly. Since he didn't have the time to braid his hair properly he grabbed a handful of the elastic ties that he sometimes used and sprinted down the corridor for the turbolift, the cloud of hair trailing him like a tail.

"Hold that!" with a shout he hurled himself into the interior, and then stared and paled as he realized who he'd just yelled at. "Oh, geez. Lt.Paris. Ensign Kim...I'm, like, so sorry, but I'm late and Ellison slipped out without me and Commander Chakotay just called me and I think I'm in big trouble here..."

"Hey, Sandburg, breath." with a patented grin Paris shook his head. "I don't stand on rank, you know that."

The young ensign had both hands wrapped in his hair, expertly twisting it into shape, a bundle of elastic ties hanging from his mouth.

"Need a hand with that?" Harry offered, giving Tom an amused grin.

"Could you? Usually I get up in plenty of time to do it, but I must've forgot to code in my wakeup call, y'know, new quarters and all, and I'm already late, it's a pain sometimes but I promised my mom I'd never cut it any shorter than this..."

"You mean it's been longer?" chuckling, Harry took the bundle of slightly dampened ties from his mouth and turned the smaller man to face the turbolift wall, his fingers taking over as Blair steadied himself with one hand.

"She never cut it from the time I was born. But it looked kinda funny, what with all that blond stuff on the ends...so this was our compromise. When I was fifteen it was almost to my feet - - of course, I was shorter then..."

"I used to do this for a girlfriend of mine." doubling the braid and fastening it, Harry repeated the motion, and then again, making a thick club of braid that hung between Sandburg's shoulderblades. "There. Will that do?"

Running his hands over it curiously, Blair turned and beamed at him.

"That's great, man, I've never worn it like this before. Thanks tons."

The lift halted and they all got out at once. Blair made as if to take off again, but Tom stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. While Blair stared, deep blue eyes wide, he straightened the collar of the grey turtleneck that was worn beneath the uniform and then grinned at the younger man.

"Don't let Chak scare you, huh?"

"I'm petrified." the younger man admitted. "But I gotta get in there, there might be a problem with Ellison..."

The two bridge officers watched with expressions of amusement as Sandburg, distracted, bounded off again, disappearing through the mess hall doors.

"Sandburg! Where the hell were you?" the first officer's voice rang through the room. The people who weren't already staring turned to look and Blair felt a blush stain his cheeks.

"I, um, I overslept, sir." he mumbled, coming to attention before the angry man.

"Do something about this." Chak snapped, one hand making a jerky gesture toward the table beside him. "He won't respond to me."

Practically creeping around the big Indian, Blair caught his breath.

Ellison sat stone-still, his chest just barely moving, eyes blank and face expressionless.

The fork he had lifted was still in midair, his mouth caught in the act of opening.

"Man, how long has he been like this?" falling to his knees beside his charge, the Ensign reached a hand to tentatively stroke the still face. "He's cold."

"Maybe fifteen minutes...I didn't realize what had happened at first." the bigger man said grudgingly. "Can you get him out of it?"

"I can try. Never done it before, of course..."

Tom and Harry came into the room and paused to watch the drama. Most of the people on the ship had seen this now, as Ellison's condition worsened and he zoned more frequently, seemingly every little thing capable of sending him off.

Blair rested one hand on Ellison's knee under the table, and stroked his face with the fingertips of the other. Chakotay stepped back and motioned to everyone else to leave them alone.

When he spoke the closest members of the audience did a doubletake. It didn't sound like Sandburg...

"Ellison. Ellison. James Ellison. Hey, man. I don't know where you are, but it's time to come back now. It's time to be here, Ellison. Time to be back here, come back now..." he continued in this softly soothing, reassuring, calm tone for several minutes. Chak's jaw tightened and he reached for his communicator, but Harry's hand stopped him.

"He's getting through. Look."

The arm that held up the fork began to tremble. It fell with a clatter as the fingers spasmed open, and then the hand rose shakily to rub harshly across the face that was beginning to show some emotion.

Fear, and worry. Embarrassment.

And then, suddenly, anger.

"What the hell?!" shoving his chair back from the table, the big Sentinel kicked out at the man crouched beside him, a foot catching him solidly on the side of the head and sending him sprawling with a yelp of surprise.

"Ellison!" Chakotay shouted. Before he could react Tom and Harry had grabbed Blair's arms and pulled him out of range as Ellison stood unsteadily, his face thunderous. "Stand down!!" Chak bellowed, grabbing Ellison's arm and yanking on it threateningly.

"He was touching me, Sir!" Ellison roared.

"He brought you out of a fifteen-minute zone, Ellison!" stepping so that they were eye-to-eye, Chak matched the tone. Ellison flinched.

"No, hey, wait, I'm okay..." staggering to his feet, ignoring the warnings of Tom and Harry, Sandburg stumbled toward the two men. "I startled him, that's all, he didn't mean to hurt me..."

Seeing the deep purple bruise that was slowly spreading across the pretty face, Chakotay snarled.

"Take your roommate to sickbay, Ellison. And if you ever do something like that again...!" he bit the words off, unable to even articulate the threat, he was too angry.

"It's not his fault, Commander." Finally straightening completely, Sandburg spoke quietly. "Emergence from a zone can be very disorienting. He just misunderstood my intentions..."

"Not hardly, you little freak." Ellison snorted.

Chakotay just gave him an enraged glare.

"That's enough from you." stepping up into the fray, Tom spoke when he saw that Chakotay couldn't. "Sandburg just saved your life, lt. You owe him your thanks, if not some courtesy."

"It's not like I asked him to, is it?" the words rolled angrily into the air.

"I'll take him to sickbay." Harry reached for Blair's arm, but the smaller man resisted.

"Look, I don't care what you think of me." he spoke to the Sentinel sincerely, looking dignified despite the unsteadiness of his balance and the careful way he cocked his head. "But I know I can help you. Nobody else has even been able to reach you that deep."

Pale blue eyes flashed at him.

"I understand your anger, and I know it's not directed at me, not really. If you let me help you, you won't have to be so angry all the time."

The anger didn't fade, but did seem to ease. Ellison's eyes traveled the badly bruised face, which was beginning to swell.

"I'm sorry I hurt you." he said grudgingly. "Let's get that seen to."

He didn't offer Blair his arm to lean on, just turned and began walking away. Sandburg shook Harry off and followed him, shuffling a little.

Chakotay called after them.

"You're off duty for the day, both of you. Spend the time getting acquainted."

There was no response.

"And that's an order." he added under his breath.

Ellison gave him a nod as he went out the door, followed, more slowly, by Sandburg.

"He's gonna eat that kid alive." Tom said with a sigh.

"Sandburg's tougher than he looks." Harry said thoughtfully. "Could be he's just what Ellison needs."

"And this entire mess is exactly why Sentinels don't belong in Star Fleet." sitting back down and studying his now cold breakfast, Chakotay motioned to them to join him. "No race that - conservative - does."

"His abilities can only be an advantage, sir." Harry protested.

"He hasn't exactly adopted the IDIC, Har." leaning to give his lover a quick kiss on the cheek, Tom smiled at him. "How do you graduate from Fleet Academy without that?"

"It cuts both ways, Paris. The right to not believe is as strong as the right to agree with it."

They all nodded and changed the subject by mutual unspoken agreement.

"Hey, Sandburg!" breaking into a broad smile, Harry Kim nudged his lover with an elbow. Grinning, Tom reached a foot out under the table to push out the chair on the other side. Sandrine's was moderately crowded tonight.

"You're alone?" the pilot sounded comically disbelieving. For the last three months Sandburg had been attached to Ellison's side like a very large, very energetic leech.

"Ellison had something to do with Commander Chakotay and then a workout with Mr.Tuvok. So I'm on my own for a couple of hours." and he looked pleased by the prospect.

"Wanna play some pool?" Tom said slyly.

The empath looked him up, and down.

"No thank you. I'm hoarding my replicator rations."

"Got something special in mind?" Harry joined in with a tease. "Or someone? Ensign Marcel in engineering was asking about you just yesterday."

"Really?" The Auterian?" the attractive face brightened and he sounded interested. "Man, I love that purple hair-and-eyes thing herm has going."

Hearing the correct pronoun for the hermaphroditic Auterian, Tom shook his head.

"Okay, I think I'll go hustle Be'Llana now." he grinned and stood. "Don't let him get you all worked up, ensign, we have other plans for the evening."

He waited around just long enough to enjoy Harry's faint blush, Sandburg grinning widely at them, and then headed over to harass his favorite engineer.

"Man, that feels so good." Leaning back in his chair, body splaying loosely, Sandburg's grin spread.

"What?" startled by the words and the change in body language, Harry picked his drink up.

"The two of you. Together. You're, like, totally in sync. I can let my shields down around you and just soak it up."

"How does that feel?" setting the glass down again, Harry leaned forward. "I've never known an empath before, though I've met a couple of Betazoids. Do you just know what other people are feeling or do you feel it too?"

"I can do it either way. Betazoids just know, they don't actually feel the emotion they sense. It's harder for me to just read it without feeling it, so most of the time I keep it shut down, except around people I know are gonna feel good."

"Does it work during sex?" the oriental man's eyes danced as he teased. When the crew had first learned there was a Leerist aboard, rumors had flown about his presumed sexual appetite. Disappointing them all, Sandburg had had three or four very discreet, short-lived affairs and then disappeared from the dating scene. Tom Paris had picked up the sexual athlete title in his stead, and run with it until Harry caught him.

It wasn't a question he would normally ask a friend, but Sandburg was, by nature and religion, a most open-minded individual. He wouldn't be offended.

"Want to find out?" the expression on the pretty face was teasing, but the blue eyes were serious.

"I, um, oh wow..." blushing again, caught off-guard, Harry let his eyes drop to the table. "Um, no. I don't think so."

"I knew you'd say that." with a theatrical sigh Sandburg began tapping a foot, fingers picking up the rhythm on the tabletop. "Yeah, it can. But most of the time I don't know my partners well enough to chance it. There can be this great echo effect if I'm close enough to somebody emotionally...but the less pleasant stuff gets magnified too." he shrugged, aware of Harry's suddenly sympathetic concern. "So if I haven't been close enough to get a good feel off somebody I don't take the chance."

"I always thought something like that would be great to have." Harry reached over and patted the tapping hand. "But it sounds a lot more complicated than I'd like to live with."

"Way more." seeing the other ensign's curious glance at the archaic phrase, Sandburg grinned. "A lot more. Wanna hear a secret?"

"yeah." brightening, Harry leaned further forward. Sandburg leaned close to close the remaining distance.

"Ellison likes me." the words were whispered in a conspiratory manner.

"What?!" keeping his voice down with an effort, Harry couldn't restrain his surprise. "Likes you or likes you likes you?"

"A little of both right now. That's how I keep tabs on him and catch him zoning. He can feel it happening, but by then it's too late for him to do anything to stop it. As soon as I figured that out I learned to stop it for him, by distracting him. So I know he likes me. I've felt it."

"He's a Sentinel, Blair." almost no one used the guy's first name and Harry briefly wondered why. "If he felt that way it would make him angry. Remember how he reacted that first day when you just barely touched him?"

"Relax, Harry. He doesn't even know. It's buried so deep he may never dig it out." dismissing the potential catastrophe with a careless wave of his hand, Blair leaned back again, his dark blue eyes twinkling with mischief. "So...tell me about Ensign Marcel. What does herm like?"

"Dammit, Sandburg, be still!"

The snarled reprimand was becoming old song to the energetic ensign. He'd heard it with increasing regularity over the past three months as he relaxed into his new surroundings. He looked up from his computer console, abruptly realizing that he was tapping his fingers on his thigh, and grinned at his irritated roommate.

"Sorry, man. I didn't realize I was doing that."

"Again." Tossing down the datapadd he was reading from, Ellison stood. "Computer. Are there any holodecks open?"

"Holodeck Three is currently unoccupied. The next scheduled user time is 0300." the calm voice did nothing to sooth the agitated Sentinel.

"I'm going to blow some holodeck time." Ellison glared at Sandburg, arms folded over his chest.

"I'll come with you. I can finish this outline tomorrow. It's not like I'm going to get published from out here." rapidly shutting down his file, the younger man bounced to his feet.

"I need some time to myself." the glare became a threat.

"I'm supposed to look after you." crossing his own arms in imitation of Ellison's stance, Sandburg stepped deliberately into Ellison's personal space. "You're not fooling me here, dude."

"Why do you talk like that?" Holding his ground, Ellison tried to change the subject.

"My mother likes it. I'm not letting you hide in that holodeck and zone, man, even if it is what you want." he responded without missing a beat.

"I thought Leerists consider suicide a viable option." the bigger man snapped.

"For terminal illness and various mental disorders, yeah. But there's nothing wrong with you, man, so that doesn't apply."

"You change your song to fit the audience." sneering, Ellison held out when the younger man took another step.

Slowly Sandburg raised a hand and rested it on the brawny forearm closest to him. Ellison was a statue.

After a minute the ensign smiled. A small, serious smile.

"I don't need an audience, man." he removed the hand, Ellison's pale blue eyes following it. "Let's go skiing. I've been in Vermont a couple of times, it was really cool."

With a shrug that said 'why not', the older man let the younger lead him out of their quarters.

"Commander. Could I speak to you for a minute?" popping up from the sofa, Sandburg passed Ellison as the older man entered their quarters, and skidded to a stop in front of Chakotay.

Just leaving after delivering Ellison back after a counseling session, the first officer looked worried.

"Of course, ensign. Outside?" he stepped away from the doorway.

"Yes, sir." throwing Ellison an unreadable look, Sandburg stepped out after him.

As soon as the door closed the first officer frowned.

"I hope you're not going to request reassignment. You're doing an excellent job with lt. Ellison."

"What? Oh, no, sir." with his trademark grin the ensign chuckled. "No, Ellison and I are getting along fine. I was just wondering, though...would it be possible to get a relief person assigned? I don't really mind the twenty-four hours a day thing, but it's been several months, the zones are far less frequent and..."

"And you have a date with Ensign Marcel." Chakotay said with a quick smile. He kept upon his gossip. Actually, he sorted it, deciding what Janeway needed to hear and what she didn't. It was one of the ways he sought to relieve her burden.

Sandburg's eyes widened as he stood there, and then he seemed to draw himself back in, vibrating a little as he stood in place.

"Exactly." he grinned and bounced.

"I'll speak to the captain about it, but I think we can arrange something. You still need to be on the bridge with him."

"I know that, sir. And I'm actually getting alot of work done there. All I need is a terminal. Last week I helped Marcel redesign the ergonomics of the aft thrusters accessory bay and..."

"We know you're working hard, ensign." holding up a hand, Chakotay forestalled the coming lecture. "I believe the captain has been meaning to speak to you about that. Since you are essentially working two positions, would you feel compensated with a one-third ration increase, plus a one-half increase in salary?"

"Who, me?" the blue eyes grew round and the bouncing increased. The heavy braid swayed behind him. "Oh, man, I don't need that."

"You're earning at least that, ensign."

"I'll take the salary increase, since it isn't like we're actually getting paid out here.

"We would give you more rations if we had them to spare."

A careless wave of an elegant hand.

"I don't eat much anyhow, and I don't care much about what I eat, as long as it doesn't bite back." the ensign looked thoughtful. Chakotay greeted a couple of crewmembers that passed them. "Just add the extras to the pool, okay?"

The ration pool was for crewmembers who were injured or sick and needed food they could eat. Neelix's cooking didn't always cut it when you were ill. Donation was strictly voluntary, but it seemed that everyone on the ship gave once in a while. recipients were chosen by the doctor and the captain together.

"No, wait." both hands fluttered in the air this time. "Put half the extra into the pool and give the other half to Naomi."

"Naomi? She doesn't have a ration account." Chakotay said, startled. Ensign Wildman's daughter was on her mother's account.

"Hey, every kid should have a few rations to blow." Sandburg's face was as excited as a happy child's. "I really like that idea. But don't tell her mother where they came from, okay?"

"Well, okay." smiling back at him, Chak shook his head.

"And about the relief?"

"We'll set up a schedule to get you out at least one evening a week. Will that be enough for now?"

"Absolutely. I can always bring herm back here, right?" the grin was teasing now.

"Will that be all, ensign?"

"Yes, Commander. Thank you, sir." immediately all insinuation was gone. Sandburg waited until Chakotay was gone before going back inside his quarters.

The main room was empty. Poking his head into the right-hand sleeping room, Sandburg spoke quietly.

"Ellison. You up, man?"

"What do you want, Sandburg? I'm trying to sleep."

"Just checkin' on you. You're gonna put in those earplugs I replicated for you, right? They will work."

"If it means I don't have to listen to you all night, yes."

Knowing the other man could see him in the dark, opening himself just enough to feel what Ellison was feeling -- aggravation, sadness, loneliness, and a touch of amusement on the surface, mild desire way beneath it -- Sandburg smiled and made his voice deliberately soft.

"Okay, then. G'nite, Ellison."

There was no answering sentiment, but the faint sense of loss he felt when he left the doorway warmed the empath more than any words could.

Settling back to work on the sofa, he wondered briefly. If he hung around long enough, would Ellison bond with him in self- defense?

No sense waiting for that. He had a life to live.

The next morning when Ellison arrived for breakfast Sandburg was right behind him. Uncharacteristically quiet, he brightened when Harry waved him over, but bit it back when his charge chose an isolated table off to the side.

They ate, Ellison barely touching his food, and then, when he stood to leave Sandburg did as well.

"I'm going to the bridge." the big man snarled. "You don't have to escort me."

"Like glue, man." ignoring the angry words and threatening body language, the smaller man just stood and waited for him to move. "Where you go, I go. That's the way it works."

"I can't live like this." biting off the words, Ellison turned and stalked out, uncaring of the witnesses. Sandburg shrugged and spread his hands and grinned as he followed, apparently not in the least bit intimidated.

"This gets more interesting every day." Tom told Harry softly.

"I think Sandburg could use some moral support." his lover answered seriously. "I've asked around, Tom. Everyone likes him and says what a great guy he is, but I couldn't find one person that knows where he hangs out or what he does on his free time. Whatever it is, he does it alone."

"Charity, Har? C'mon, I don't think he'd appreciate it. Besides, he's an empath, he probably just gets tired of keeping his shields up all the time."

"He's Vulcan-trained, I don't think that's the problem."

"And so he'll know if you're just being nice to him 'cause you feel sorry for him."

"He'll know that we are being nice to him because we like him." Harry corrected, catching Tom's hand on the tabletop. "Right, Thomas?"

"Oh, no fair. You know what it does to me when you say my name that way..." Tom met Harry's dark eyes with his own crystal-blue ones. "Yes, Harry. I think I can like him...if we can just keep up."

They shared a laugh and finished breakfast in good spirits.

On the bridge several hours later those spirits had faded. Faced with a sudden unexplained power failure and an alien ship intent on taking advantage of it, Janeway called prime bridge staff. But Tuvok was injured when, on his way to the bridge, the power went out in the turbolift and the inertial dampers shut down, allowing the lift to fall several floors. The catch-cushion at the bottom of the shaft did work, but the passengers were still all injured to some degree...Tuvok the most seriously as he protected Ensign Wildman's young daughter Naomi with his body. Confined to sickbay by an irate doctor, he would be out of commission for several days as a skull fracture was delicately healed.

Ellison was his relief. With a hard look of worry she acknowledged his presence and continued her quest to speak to the aliens. Time dragged and the bridge was tense and quiet after hours of no response.

"No response to the hail, captain." Ellison said again, his voice flat and controlled.

They were picking up life signs, but they were very faint, hard to read.

"Ensign Sandburg." a wave to the young man sitting behind Ellison's station, his small body practically vibrating.

"Captain?" with a bound he was beside her chair, both Janeway and Chakotay studying him.

"You're an empath. Are you picking up anything from the alien ship?"

He shook his head, once.

"I can't do line of sight, sirs. They actually have to be in the same room as I am. I'm not as strong as my mother."

"Damn." saying the word quietly, the captain looked him over. "Is he - ready - to be on the bridge? I can have him relieved if not." she almost whispered and Sandburg smiled.

"He's not listening, sir. In fact, he's making a deliberate effort to not hear you. Yes, he's fine. I think I'll be able to catch a zone if one hits. And his firing record on the photon torpedoes has never been beaten."

"Thank you. Return to your seat."

"If you can get them over here, captain, I can tell you exactly what they're feeling." the ensign promised, recklessly it seemed to Kathryn.

With another nod she dismissed him and he bounced back up to his seat.

"Exactly, hm." Janeway murmured to Chakotay.

"Makes you wonder just what he picks up, doesn't it."

"At least he has Vulcan ethics to go by." the captain gave a tiny shudder. "A liberal empath going around the ship telling everyone what everyone else is really feeling..." the shudder repeated itself.

"Why, Kathryn." Chak smiled slowly, briefly relieving the tension. "Do you have something to hide?"

Four hours became ten. Ten became twenty. The prime crew was sent to rest and eat in shifts of two, for three hours each. After the second rotation Tom and Harry came back looking no more rested, but certainly more relaxed.

Kathryn watched closely as Harry stopped and leaned to speak to Sandburg, who had remained in his place throughout. The xenothropologist beamed at the Ops man and Harry blushed faintly when he said something, then grinned back.

"Well, my suspicions are confirmed." she muttered to Chak. "I don't think Tom and Harry got any rest." the first officer agreed, hiding a smile.

"Torres to Captain Janeway." the urgent, angry tone of the Chief Engineer sparked through the room.

"Go ahead, B'Ellana."

"I think I've found the problem, captain. We're being hit with an invisible field of some sort, I don't recognize the source. But I have found that their shields are derived from a completely different system as ours - and we can transport through them."

"Excellent work." standing, Janeway eyed the crew, who watched expectantly. "Chakotay, take an away team - Ellison, Sandburg, Kim and Torres."

Tom's mouth formed a protest that was never spoken.

"I'm sorry, Tom, but I need you here, in case we need to move quickly."

"Aye, captain."

Chakotay leaned over her, arms folded across his chest.

"Ellison and Sandburg?"

"He's the best qualified security officer we have with Tuvok down. Sandburg will keep him in line."

A snort and then a nod. Chak turned and strode toward the turbolift.

Harry paused for just a minute beside Tom's seat, not looking at him, one strong square hand resting on the warmth of Tom's shoulder. Tom didn't look up, but covered the hand with one of his own and squeezed. Janeway smiled slightly as Harry joined the others.

After locating large enough space on what would seem to be an incredibly crowded alien ship, the transport felt the same as any other, and they gathered to consider their options as Sandburg scanned the small room they materialized in. Everyone had to crouch, especially Chakotay and Jim, the ceiling was barely five feet.

"It's locked." Harry said, trying the door. It was shaped oddly, rather pear-shaped, with the bulbous part on the bottom. Chakotay joined him.

Catching Jim with his head cocked to one side, Sandburg touched his shoulder lightly.

"Stay with us, man." he said softly.

With a blink and a shake to clear his head, the lt. nodded.

"It's not any code I recognize..." Harry and Chakotay were taking turns working on what appeared to be the handle or door sensor. It was a concave metal surface, a circle about five inches across, that tilted when they put their hands on it, rocking in it's depression in the wall.

"Let Ellison try." Sandburg was behind them, his usual energy constrained. Chakotay was glad to see he could keep it under wraps when he needed to.

Nodding, the big man moved up when they stepped aside. He leaned close, one hand on the circle, fingers spread to the edges, an ear pressed to the door. Sandburg leaned beside him, speaking quietly in his other ear.

Sentinels were trained from birth, but Ellison had a particularly strong dose of the racial traits. After working with him for only a few days the young ensign had a pretty good idea of what he could do if he was pushed.

"Okay....can you hear the tones?"

"I can hear the energy passing through the circuits." the man answered just as quietly. Chakotay and Kim exchanged glances. They'd never expected Ellison to take direction this well, not from anyone.

"If you can hear it, man, you can feel it." Sandburg shifted so that his shoulder was just touching Ellison's, his breath brushing warmly over the Sentinel's other ear.

"I don't think so, Chief." the nickname was sarcastic. "Don't get all metaphysical on me."

"I've read all the reports, Ellison. It's not that uncommon an ability...you just have to focus. Clear your mind and concentrate..."

Harry was scanning with the tricorder, but the composition of the walls prevented a good reading. He kept trying,then heard Chakotay's soft indrawn breath.

Looking back, he saw that Jim's eyes were slightly glazed, but his fingers were moving on the keypad.

"Feel how the energy jumps the circuits, where it ends? That's the next connection." Sandburg said quietly. "Follow it to the end and the door will be open...don't try so hard, man, you're gonna zone..." a bump from his shoulder made Ellison glare at him before returning to the work.

"There." stepping back, and away from Sandburg, Ellison grinned as the door slid open, from bottom to top, with a creaking hiss.

"Good job, both of you." Chakotay said as he passed them into the just-as-small corridor. "Let's see if we can find the bridge of this thing."

It happened just a few minutes later. They came to a place where the hall divided. They stopped, waiting for the Commander to decide which path they should take, and, suddenly, a wall was coming down from the ceiling, fast, for no apparent reason.

It was headed directly for Blair, who was standing next to Harry. The hallway was only about four feet wide, he couldn't move without squashing the other man.

"Sandburg!" Chak and Ellison shouted together. Then the sentinel shoved the younger man to the other side of the corridor, hard, pushing him into Harry and knocking both of them down.

"Shit!" the verbal ensign fell, and heard the sound of Harry hitting his head on the wall, and then the pain as the descending wall caught him across the legs.

"We need an emergency beam-out, captain!" Chakotay's voice was controlled but worried.

"I don't know if we have enough power left, Commander." she sounded half-worried and half-pissed. "The power drain just cycled up a minute ago. What happened?"

"I'm not exactly sure. we were separated by a hidden wall...hang on, oh, dammit, Ellison!"

"Chakotay. Commander Chakotay! What happened."

His voice was back again in a minute.

"He's zoned, captain, and I can't get him out of it."

"Then you better find a way to reach Sandburg, Commander."

"Aye, sir. Chakotay out."

The com crinkled with static for a few seconds and then the connection was cut.

"Oh gods, oh man..." Sandburg's low hissed comments were audible on the other side of the barrier.

"Can you hear me, Sandburg? Harry?"

"He's knocked cold, Commander." Sandburg said between clenched teeth. "And I wish I were."

"I'm going to check your feet..." Blair felt his boots slipped off carefully and smothered a groan by stuffing his fist into his mouth. "Can you feel this?" warm fingers tugged at his toes in turn.

"Yeah, it hurts. Is Ellison okay?"

"He's zoned." Chakotay sighed. "Look, this wall starts at the division between the passages...I'm going to backtrack and see if I can go around it."

"Can't you burn through it with your phaser?" a reasonable question, Chak decided.

"The two of you are too close. If I don't find a way around it I'll try to do that farther away."

"Ellison...is he breathing okay?"

"As far as I can tell. He's just staring off into space again."

"You need to hurry, Commander."

"I'm aware of that, ensign." the first officer's voice was gentle despite the words.

Blair lay, resting his head on Harry's chest, because it was the only thing available, trying to breathe through the pain. When his friend woke up, he figured he'd get a chance to explain himself before Harry slugged him. The interior of this ship was colder than theirs, making the floor downright chilly, and Harry was warm.

"Sandburg!" the shout came from his left, back the way they had come. He opened his eyes to see Chakotay making his way carefully to him in the narrow space.

"Gods, I'm glad to see you."

"The barrier goes as far as the room we came from." Chak got as close to him as he could, then studied the situation. "How am I going to get you out of here?" Pulling out the medkit, he used the hypospray to revive Harry, who came to with a groan and a hand to his head.

"What happened?" he looked down at Blair, still using him for a pillow.

"The wall came down."

Chakotay blinked, unable to believe the ensign was joking at a time like this.

"Ellison pushed you both out of the way." he said. "We have to get Sandburg freed and carry him around to Ellison, before he goes too deep. Voyager can't help us right now."

Sandburg winced at the words, but held up his hand as Chakotay loaded another hypospray.

"I can't get to Ellison if I'm knocked out."

"I'll revive you after we move you." the first officer said. "I don't think we can move you without hurting you, Sandburg."

"Good thing I'm not very big." the young man said, resigned. He let Chakotay deliver the painkiller, and quickly slipped into unconsciousness.

"What is going on here, Commander?" Harry asked as he maneuvered himself out from beneath the wounded man, laying his head on the floor carefully. The space they had left was about two feet wide, which left them very little room to move, both had their backs pressed to the wall. "This wall dropped for no reason, everything is so small..."

"We'll find out when we find whoever's running this ship." Chak said shortly. "Let's get him loose."

It took several minutes of pulling and then some yanking. Seeing the swelling already painfully obvious in both legs, Chakotay was very glad Sandburg had agreed to be anesthetized for this.

They had to carry him almost sideways to get him down the space, and then work to get him around the other end and beside Ellison. When Harry checked the lt.'s breathing was beginning to falter.