Memory Test

*********

Alec leaned back. His head was swimming and his belly was full. Seregil's legs were braced behind him.

The cushion he sat on was soft enough to pillow the hard stone floor.

He tipped his head back and looked up at Seregil's face, slightly blurred.

"You've had too much to drink, tali." Strong, calloused hands stroked his cheeks.

"I'm good." Alec protested mildly. To prove it, he sat back up, feeling the movement in slow motion. Seregil slid a knee forward to press into the small of Alec's back, propping him up.

Across the floor from them - seeming much further away than he actually was, surely - Thero raised his half-full glass. His lips curved into a shadow of a smile and he drank.

"To my rescuer." It wasn't mocking, and Alec knew the words were heartfelt. It was the next ones he didn't understand. "I always knew you would return the favor one day." Thero drained his glass and stood. He was steady on his feet.

The three of them were the only ones left. The small gathering had begun to break up when the sun set, and now Thero was leaving them, too.

Alec pulled himself to his feet, using Seregil's knee as a crutch. The powerful Aurenfaie rose with him, putting an arm around his waist and holding him upright.

"I've never seen you drink like this." Alec couldn't tell if Seregil was amused or annoyed.

"Had to do something to celebrate..."

"I bid you good night, gentlemen." Thero nodded at them and walked out of the room, still disgustingly sober.

"I should get you home. Think you can walk?"

"Quiet as a mouse." Alec promised solemnly.

"Then this will be the test." Seregil flashed a quick smile, and let go of him. Alec swayed, but kept on his feet. He watched as his -lover, that was so strange - backed slowly toward the door. It didn't occur to him to follow. Seregil had tested him before. Tested his always-expanding repertoire of nightrunning skills.

There was usually a reward for a test passed.

"Catch you if I can?"

Seregil laughed, quietly.

"That would be too much. No, you just have to make it back to the Cockerel in one piece - alone!"

"And what will I get if I do?" Alec pretended a pout. Normally he wouldn't have acted like this, but the wine really had gone to his head and he found that he rather liked teasing Seregil. He *liked* being silly, and trying to be sexy.

As long as he wasn't *thinking* about it.

"What do you want, tali?" Suddenly Seregil's voice sounded like it was right in his ear, and Alec could almost *feel* the warmth of his body pressed close. He blushed, and Seregil laughed again.

"Not *that*" Alec heard himself mumbling. Then he had a flash of insight, and he squinted, lips pursing. "I want to ask you a *question*."

"What question?" Now Seregil was looking wary.

"Not about your childhood or your family." Alec shook his head, but that made him blink. Seregil came closer again, and Alec waved him off.

"A question." He repeated stubbornly.

Seregil stared at him for the longest time. Then he smiled, slyly, and nodded. "One question. I will answer it." He stepped nimbly to the door, and Alec blinked at him, only now wondering if he could make it back alone.

"Seregil -"

"Did I forget to mention there's a time limit? Two hours, Alec!" Seregil flashed that smile again, and was out the door. Gone.

Alec swayed, as if Seregil's absence had left a vacuum in the room and the wind was rushing in to fill it.

***

As the door swung shut, and Alec swayed, he wondered if perhaps, this time, he hadn't extended himself too far.

Usually when Seregil presented him with a challenge Alec felt entirely capable of meeting it. Wether it was a new lock or an intricate climbing maneuver, he knew that he could do - or if he couldn't do it, he would learn.

All he had to do tonight was walk home.

That didn't seem so bad.

Walk home. Alone. Heavily intoxicated.

He might be seen as a target, by someone that didn't know him.

Most people in town didn't know him.

He wasn't dressed particularly well. There was an even chance he would be ignored; one of the masses.

But that could just as easily make him a target.

He needed a plan, but his fuzzy brain wouldn't latch onto one.

He took a step, and didn't fall down.

Okay, then. The first goal was to get out of the building and away from Oreska House. Hopefully without being seen. If Magyana caught him like this, she's probably snatch him up and put him to bed. Which might be nice - he was actually pretty tired - but then he wouldn't win the prize Seregil had offered.

Maybe when he got home - late or not - Seregil would be waiting for him. And then Seregil could tuck him into bed warm and tight.

Which was the best thing. Having Seregil tuck him in would be much, much better than Magyana.

Too many minutes has passed. He wasn't sure *how* many, but knew it was too many. So. Another step. Then two, and then Alec was at the door. It opened without a creak - so well-maintained - and he slipped into the hall, half-crouching, sure someone would be there.

Someone would notice him.

As he held himself, still and quiet, he realized he was alone. It was very late, and the only occupants of the house still awake were probably in the laboratories performing arcane rituals or setting up spells.

They weren't loitering in the hallways waiting for drunken little thieves to come stumbling into their clutches.

Alec proved the proof of his thoughts by stumbling as soon as he straightened up. He caught himself with a hand on the door, bumping his knee. With a quick breath he sucked in the pain and pushed off the wall and started walking.

A little song rang in his head, a children's song he'd heard on the streets - one-foot, two-foot, one-foot, two-foot.... it was really annoying that he couldn't remember the rest of it.

Things seemed to swim in and out of focus. At one point, making his way carefully down the back stairs, he could have sworn there were two sets of stairs, one going off to the left and one to the right. So he aimed for the blank space in the middle, figuring the other two would cancel each other out.

It seemed to work; he didn't fall, and the stairs remained solid beneath his unsure feet.

There were three doors at the bottom, where he remembered only one. He chose the middle one again, and was frustrated when his hand refused to grip the handle he could see. It was blurred, almost a reflection of the normal twisted brass, but it should have been there.

He had to lean on the wall while he thought about the problem, and the wall seemed willing to hold him up, tilting obligingly. So it was a surprise when he reached for the next door handle and found himself on the floor.

He was glad Seregil wasn't here to see him like this; it would have been embarrassing. Now Alec understood why his father, stoic fellow that he'd been, hadn't approved of drink.

It probably wouldn't have eased his pain, anyhow.

Alec shook his head vigorously and over-balanced himself. A desperate grab miraculously gave him the real door handle and he was saved from more bumps and bruises, and he got the door open.

He didn't remember there being a step down from that doorway to the kitchens beyond - but he went down to one knee anyhow.

It was easier to drag himself back up this time, though.

A door was open at the back of the long kitchen, cold air blowing in through the crack. He felt it and shivered, but it seemed to clear his head further. Though he wasn't sure how long it had taken him to creep down the stairs, he felt like he had plenty of time left. And once outside he felt even better, though he was quite cold.

His feet seemed to have recalled how they were supposed to work, and his arms were moving enough to generate some heat - so now all he had to do was get home.

At least he knew what direction that was....

Alec turned himself around and started off, in the general direction of home. It was the only home he'd ever really known; those two messy, crowded rooms, filled with Seregil's squirrel's nest of treasure and trinkets.

Especially now that he slept in the big bed, with Seregil. Though he had loved his little bed in the second room.

It had been his bed, a real bed.

He looked up, suddenly, realizing that his thoughts had led him astray. Instead of taking the most direct route back to the Cockerel, he'd meant to go round-a-bout and avoid the more desperate areas.

Instead he seemed to have walked straight into them.

The first sign of trouble was the haggle of streetwalkers coming toward him. Too ugly or in poor health, these were the women that couldn't get places on the Street of Lights.

So they simply hung out in seedy taverns and peddled their questionable wares wherever they could find a buyer.

This particular group had already spent what coin they'd earned, if any - spent it on wine or cheap beer, and something that smelled very, very bad.

Because *they* smelled very, very bad.

Alec slowly realized that he probably didn't have the right to criticize, considering his current condition - but either way, the last thing he wanted was a confrontation with them.

Though he knew Seregil found him attractive, and heard it mentioned by others, he wasn't really certain he believed them. They were biased, after all. But if that were the case, then these women would see him as a prime catch, and stop at nothing to get him into their clutches, and their beds - if they had any.

He looked around, a bit wildly. There didn't seem to be any good escape routes. He really hadn't been paying attention to where he was going!

To his left was a string of small, poorly lit homes, most built against the wall of the one beside it.

There were men sitting out in front of them, smoking and griping. Not people he wanted to ask for help.

To his right began the series of bars and taverns that kept such men happy.

Behind him, the wrong way. Ahead of him, a bunch of stinky street whores.

What to do?

As soon as he thought about it, he realized; he was a nightrunner. Trained by Seregil, he was one of the elite.

There was absolutely no reason for him to be nervous. Those women wouldn't even see him if he didn't want them to.

He wished he had a cloak to pull over his head had he left his back at Oreska House? but there were shadows aplenty.

"Luck in the shadows," he whispered to himself, almost as if he could hear Seregil's voice saying it.

With several small, careful steps he went backwards and took refuge in the dark pools at the base of the first shack. He crouched, shivering slightly, and held his breath, willing the darkness to close around him. Hold me in your arms, mother night... his thoughts took an oddly lyrical turn, but he didn't laugh. Only held his position until the women, who smelled even worse as they passed him by, were safely out of sight. He could hear the greetings and jeers exchanged with the  with the standing men, and knew that some of those women were wives, even mothers.

The thought saddened him, even as he stood and began to move off more carefully, aware that his mind was not clear and his feet were not steady.

He was vulnerable.

Having not had a mother, it might be that he held the office in too high an esteem - but with Kari as an example, he couldn't stand the thought of any child being subjected to this life.

Not his problem, though.

His problem was going to be getting through this section of town and around to the Cockerel before he ran out of time.

Preferably in one piece.

It wasn't so hard to keep to the shadows on this side of town; there were lots of them. The hard part was keeping quiet, and keeping the shadows quiet when he inadvertently stepped on one that turned out to be someone sleeping.

Too drunk to go home, or with no home to go for, they found refuge in the shadows as well.

He tried not to disturb them, but it was pretty dark and he couldn't see all that well. His vision seemed to be clearing, though, and that was good.

But his hearing wasn't great. There was a ringing in his ears, and he felt clumsy. He tripped over another shivering body wrapped in rags, and mumbled 'sorry' as he tried to hold himself up onto the wall and not make things worse.

The fall brought him to a complete halt.

There was a sudden silence.

Voices sounded far away; shouts, curses, laughter.

And the sound of booted feet, not nearly far enough away to be comfortable.

Alec listened, just long enough to believe they were coming his way.

Like, directly toward him.

He wondered if he was as well-hidden as he'd thought....

The footsteps became louder, and there were more of them.

A street gang. Probably looking for an easy victim to roll.

They would most likely kill him and take his clothes, to sell to a rag merchant.

Seregil had picked these clothes for him. Alec felt kind of fond of them. Not to mention the whole 'killing' part, which he'd rather avoid. He stood as still as he could, but the footsteps kept getting closer.

He was used to being afraid. He knew Seregil felt it too, sometimes. It was just part of the job. So it wasn't the fear that made his feet move.

It was self-preservation. Perhaps ill-timed, but he had to get out of there before whoever it was that was following him caught up to him.

He darted out onto the street and heard shouts, too close, and ducked back into an alley, then kept running.

The movement pushed adrenalin through his system and he felt himself waking up. He felt much better, in fact.

At last he slowed, and then stopped, to catch his breath. He was panting like Seregil was - well, maybe not the time to think about that. But if he could make it home in ten minutes, and he gave Seregil a break on the question thing, then maybe he could get all sweaty and panty for a better reason.

With that thought in mind, Alec started off at a trot. He was warm now and his head was clearer and it was only a few more blocks to home.

He entered their rooms with a shiver. Hadn't realized he was this cold.

Seregil was waiting for him. Or not waiting, as it were. He was seated comfortably in front of the fire, a glass of wine in his hand, still dressed.

"I made it." Alec announced.

"Of course you did." Seregil smiled at him and spread his legs

Alec stumbled over and settled himself on the floor between those legs, facing Seregil, cuddling his head to the silk-covered stomach.

Which wasn't nearly as warm as he'd wanted it to be. In fact he ran his hands down Seregil's legs and up underneath his shirt his lover felt almost as cold as he did.

"Seregil?" At least his voice wasn't shaking.

"Hm?" Strong hands stroked Alec's hair, rubbed at his temples, making him want to turn over and purr.

"How long have you been home?"

"Long enough, tali." It was clear he wasn't interested in the conversation. His hands traveled to the back of Alec's neck and tugged him upwards for a kiss. His mouth was warm and spicy from the wine, his lips tender.

"I'm not going to forget the question," Alec warned him. He felt his lover stiffen and begin to pull away. "Seregil, wait. Trust me. Nothing about your family or your childhood. I agreed."

"You push, Alec."

"How else will I ever know about you?" Alec kissed the hands he held, keeping one of them against his mouth as he whispered. "How else can I help you heal?"

"Just being here is enough." Seregil pulled him close again. "Ask, then, and I'll do my best to answer."

"Earlier tonight " Alec hesitated, but then just spit it out. it seemed that drinking affected his reasoning skills as well, because he normally wouldn't have been so blunt about something with so much potential to upset his lover. "When Thero thanked you for saving him, he said something about you one day returning the favor. What did he mean?"

He watched Seregil's face harden and almost regretted asking. Not enough to let him off the hook, though.

"Please, tali," he pressed between Seregil's legs and against his torso. "Just an answer. I won't ask again."

Seregil reached out and ran a hand through Alec's hair, fingers twining in the golden strands.

"I'll try," he said. Then he said nothing more for a while and Alec wondered if it was going to be too hard. He sat back on his knees and lay his head on Seregil's thigh, giving him time. If he couldn't answer, then he couldn't. He was trying and Alec could ask no more than that.

"It was after I was replaced. After Thero took my place and I left Oreska house." Seregil's tone was matter-of-fact, but Alec could tell from the way he sat that the memory was as painful as ever. "I felt I had nothing to live for. I had no skills and no trade... I took a room on the Street of Lights."

Alec fought to hide his wince. He'd often suspected something like this, but to have confirmation was different than suspecting.

"In a house that welcomed men, of course." There was the usual self-depreciating tone to the words and Alec turned his head just enough to bite Seregil's thigh. To warn him not to talk about himself that way. The hand in his hair pulled gently in retaliation. "It wasn't a bad life. I was very popular, and could pick and choose visitors. Sometimes I would be asked by those I didn't know, and I could turn them down if I chose."

Alec waited while Seregil went through the memory in his head, watching his face as it changed from hard to regretful.

"Most times I didn't take strangers. But there was one night, when I was very drunk... there was a man. A human man. Very large and dark, something about him excited me. So I went to him and offered him my services. He seemed startled, but accepted. No one warned me about him, or if they did I ignored them. I don't remember much about that, only what happened after."

"It went badly?" Alec felt a need to say it himself, so that Seregil wouldn't have to.

"It went more than badly." Seregil exhaled a long, slow sigh. "He was brutal, and vicious and far stronger than I had suspected. I couldn't get away from him, and every time I tried he hit me. I was bruised and bleeding by the time he decided to take me, my eyes blackened, my arm broken. It hurt worse than anything I'd felt, physically, and I fought him as hard as I could. But he was bigger and stronger and I couldn't get away."

"Did you call for help?" Alec held himself still, not wanting to disrupt the flow of memory. There would be time later to comfort his lover.

"I did. As loudly as I could. He laughed and said no one would come, not in a brothel. Unfortunately, he was right."

"How does Thero come into this?" As far as Alec knew, the mage had held to his vow of celibacy then. He would have had no reason to be on the Street of Lights.

"He heard me. I'm still not sure how far away he was, or if magic was involved but he heard me. He came as fast as he could. I remember the shock on his face when he broke through the  locked door, the horror and the pity. He tore him off me and threw him out the window like he was a toy, while I lay there and whimpered like a child."

"You were hurt." Alec kissed his thigh, the fabric tasted smoky.

"I was stupid."

"You couldn't have known he would be like that."

"I shouldn't have approached him without asking about him first."

Seeing that Seregil was determined to feel guilty about this, Alec asked more about the story.

"What did Thero do?"

"He got me to a healer, got me patched up. I begged him to not tell Nysander, and he never did, as far as I know. I was surprised by his kindness, considering how we felt about each other. I admit that I suspected some ulterior motive."

"Did he ever ask for anything in return?"

"Never." Now Seregil looked down at Alec, and his eyes were clear. "It's not my favorite memory, tali, but it doesn't bring the kind of pain some do."

Alec pushed up on his knees and kissed him.

"I would thank you for sharing it with me, but I'm not sure thanks are appropriate."

"I don't think it was a suitable reward for your success tonight." Seregil smiled at him, and only Alec could detect the sadness in it.

"I'm still glad you told me," he said, and proved it with a deep, hungry kiss. He was warm now, and so was Seregil, who had been sitting in front of the fire for hours hang on.

Alec pulled back when he needed air, and frowned at Seregil.

"Did you follow me?"

Seregil cradled his face in both hands.

"Did you think I was *really* going to let you walk alone?"

His mind was clearer, but not ready to think that through, so Alec just stared. Seregil grinned, one of his Cheshire-cat grins that softened the lines in his face and made him look happier.

"I knew you could do it, tali. I just wanted to be sure nothing happened to you. I would have never forgiven myself."

Alec considered this.

"So you weren't doubting me?"

"Not even a little bit. Though I was slightly concerned when that gaggle of stinkers almost got you -"

"Urg, don't remind me!" Alec grinned back. Seregil was always looking after him. "So, where's my reward?"

Seregil pushed him back and Alec settled on his knees, watching with rapt interest as his lover undid his trousers and exposed himself.

"Right here." Seregil slid out of his shirt and let it fall to the floor.

"And what am I supposed to do with that?" Alec began unfastening his own clothing.

"Anything you want. That's what makes it a reward."

"So I could just ignore it?" Alec asked. He didn't want to try standing, so he lay back on the floor to kick off his boots and trousers, then sat back up on his knees.

"If you like." Seregil's eyes were hot as they looked upon him. He was gripping the arms of the chair as if afraid to let go.

"Or I could eat you like a piece of candy?" Alec crept closer on his knees, hands on the floor.

"That would be good."

"Or maybe I could tip you over backwards and have my way with you?" Alec felt himself blush as he said this, but he could blame it on the fire if Seregil said anything about it.

"Anything, tali." Seregil was breathing heavier now, and a light sweat had sprung up on his body.

He shifted lower in the chair, offering himself. "Alec..."

"I know what I want!" Alec said with laughing enthusiasm. "A taste of you, and then a taste of me -" Without saying anything further he put his hands on Seregil's thighs and leaned in, mouthing his cock from top to bottom. He nuzzled in the crease on thigh and groin, licking the curly hair, tasting Seregil's faint musk and the need he emanated.

Those strong hands closed on his head. Not holding, just stroking, because he had to do something with his hands, a feeling Alec understood. He held the base of Seregil's cock with his own hand while he sucked the flared head of it into his mouth, tonguing the tiny slit. He was rewarded with a burst of salty-bitter flavor. The taste of his lover, leaking from inside him.

Seregil moaned faintly. His hands clenched on Alec's head and then let go again, returning to the arms of the chair.

"Love you, tali" he whispered. Alec tightened his mouth around the organ and hummed deep in his throat. It was a trick he'd only recently learned. It made Seregil toss his head and moan louder.

"Oh, oh, too close, Alec, not ready -"

"I know." Reluctantly, Alec pulled away. Seregil must have really been looking forward to this if he was close already. He stood, touching himself, mildly shy about it, but wanting Seregil to see.

"My turn?" Seregil reached for him, mouth open, but Alec shook his head.

"My reward, so still my turn."

With another grin he moved closer and straddled Seregil in the big chair. There was just enough room for his knees on either side of his lover. Seregil's hands went automatically to his hips to steady him.

"This is what you want?" Seregil asked him, still sucking in deep breaths to control himself.

"Mmm, yes. I think you deserve a reward as well." Carefully, Alec used one hand to hold himself on the chair arm and the other to grasp Seregil's cock and hold it upright.

"Are you loose enough?"

"I'm fine, tali." He could be such a worrier sometimes. Alec took a deep breath and slowly sat, impaling himself on Seregil's hard, hot cock. He let the breath out in a steady exhalation that lasted until he was fully seated in Seregil's lap.

His lover's hands were so tight on his hips that he knew he would have bruises in the morning.

"Ah...." Seregil tried to thrust up, but found that he didn't have the leverage, or the room. He made a disgruntled sound and Alec was able to smile at him, pleased with the circumstances.

"You're just going to have to sit there and enjoy the ride," he teased, bracing himself with both hands on the chair arms. "And keep me from falling over, please." The movement had made him dizzy again. It was rather pleasant, actually, but the floor seemed a long ways away and he knew it was cold and hard.

"Of course." Seregil flashed a smile that was more snarl, but Alec felt the hands on his hips tighten even more.

Using his thighs and arms, he lifted himself as far as he could and then slowly slid back down, taking Seregil inside himself once more. The angle was perfect, and he moaned happily as he did it again.

Seregil shifted back in the chair, sitting more upright, and pulled him closer, wrapping an arm around his waist. Alec found a rhythm, moving up and down, touching that place inside himself that made the world spin in a way totally unlike what drink did. He was tight, he could feel the burn of friction, but loose enough that he wasn't going to hurt himself as long as he didn't go too fast.

Seregil moaned his name and "...tali..." and bit down on his shoulder. His free hand slid between then and caressed Alec's cock from base to tip, making him want to push harder.

It was an effort to keep it slow, but he did, because it was what he wanted. To make this moment last, to draw it out. To replace all of Seregil's memories of pain with memories of him. So that every time Seregil thought about the past, all he would see was Alec and the love they shared.

He was brazen. Riding Seregil like a wanton, letting his head fall back as he clutched Seregil's shoulders and gasped for breath. He felt the flush as it crept over his flesh, the heat between them warming him inside and out. Seregil was whispering in his ear, telling him how beautiful he was, how hot they were together and Alec moaned again. There was no way to tell, now, which of them was in control.

The end came too quickly. Alec felt Seregil stiffen, the arm around his waist arching him further back, bruising him, and he tried to stop he wanted it to last just a little longer. Then Seregil came, chanting "Tali, tali, tali..." and Alec felt the gush of new heat inside himself. It was worth it, to feel that and see the glazed expression on Seregil's face as he slumped backwards, still holding onto Alec.

"Want to see you," he whispered and Alec shuddered. He closed his eyes, unable to watch as his lover watched him.

Seregil was still hard inside him. Alec leaned back as far as he could and spread his legs just that little bit wider, hoping the chair didn't give, and began pumping his body on Seregil's cock. As hard and fast as he could, hitting that nerve with every stroke. Until he was gasping Seregil's name with every breath and the heat in his belly exploded into something too powerful to bear.

When he finally did open his eyes, Seregil was carrying him. Not to the big bed, but to the little one, that was only a few feet away. There was just enough room for the two of them to curl close together, their naked bodies flushed and warm. They fit like a key and lock.

"Ill have to arrange more tests for you," Seregil crooned as they lay together, breathing calmed, bodies sated.

"Does that mean I'll get to ask more questions?" Alec ran a finger of Seregil's lips, tracing them. He marveled at the purity of their shape.

Seregil caught his hand, kissed the tip of his fingers.

"Maybe." He kissed Alec's forehead, then nuzzled down to rest his head on Alec's shoulder.

Arms around each other, they rested.

In the calm darkness, lit by the fading fire, Alec thought he heard Seregil whisper again as he drifted into sleep.

"Maybe."

    *** the end ***

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